THE SIMPSON SISTERS HAVE GONE TO SHIT

Okay so the story goes that Ashlee Simpson was always the fuglier sister of then hot Jessica Simpson, but when she decided to get her rank nose fixed she looked way better. Well that is until now of course if you've got eyes. The former singer (bitch please) was papped leaving a restaurant with a new man friend (totes a slut) and let's just say it's looked better. Maybe it's just a bad angle cause she looked like a fugly witch with a double chin. At least her new nose won't use any many Kleenex when she's sick.

[Image via GSI]

THIS JUST CANNOT BE LEGEND WHITNEY!

We kinda hate the last tour Whitney Houston did before she died cause not only was it her worst vocal performance, but the woman looked horrendous. The ridiculously talented and now deceased singer was papped doing her show in London back in 2010 and you literally can't tell who it is to be honest. Where the hell did her cheekbones disappear to guys? Such a shame cause music is such shit nowadays. Just sayin.'

[Image via GETTY]

HOLY MOLY WHAT HAPPENED TO JAKE?!

Now usually Jake Gyllenhaal looks pretty good but when he stepped out to an event the other night in LA he looked like an AIDS victim on death row. The actors plump face and looks appeared to be long gone and in their place was a gaunt and skeletal looking thing...pretty rank if you ask us people. We hear it's for a movie role so props to him for losing the weight so fast, but is it wrong that we're kinda jealous and wanna know his secret?

[Image via REX]

WTF BRITNEY'S GOT AN EIGHT HEAD NOW?

Man it's actually quite disturbing to see what a mess Britney Spears is these days...and you all thought Xtina had issues when she was heavier. The pop star was snapped leaving a dance rehearsal in LA over the weekend and bitch looked a total state. What the fuck is going on with the receding hairline, that fuck off spam forehead and the yellow hair? Jesus love sort yourself out cause no one will pay to see you perform live (lip sync) in Vegas looking like this!

[Image via X17]

WE DIDN'T KNOW SHAZZA WAS A GYPSY?

What the fuck has happened to the once attractive Sharon Osbourne? These days the money grabbing Jewish music manager is looking more like the Bride of Frankenstein than an aging woman. The cheap looking red barnet and puffy frozen face ain't a good look and it seems Shazza has taken her surgeries a few steps too far. Less is more lady!

[Image via REX]

CARINE ROITFELD DEFINITELY NEEDS A RAISE!

Mila Kunis really is one of those birds that needs make-up cause without it she looks dog rough and that's being kind. The actress was the face of Dior accessories not so long ago and it seems stylist Carine Roitfeld has magical powers cause she turned her from a pig into a swan judging by the above snaps. It really is shocking that this is even the same person and just proves how much celebs rely on slap these days.

[Image via DIOR/PACIFIC COAST]

WHY OH WHY DO GAYS CARRY BIRKIN BAGS?

Ew we really can't bare to look at the above snap of Johnny Weir too much cause it totes grosses us out and we ain't homophobic but he just looks wrong on so many levels. First he needs to figure out if he even wants to be a dude cause those thighs are rivaling Vicky B's pins and the boots, bag and eyebrows (oh the eyebrows people) just make us cringe inside. We just don't get what it is people?

[Image via FLYNET]

PRECIOUS COULD LITERALLY EAT RUSSIA

Okay so we get that Gabourey Sidibe is a really good actress and she's got the whole cuteness appeal, but fuck does the bitch have nasty figure. The star was papped filming scenes for her latest stint on American Horror Story in New Orleans recently and it looked like she'd ballooned even more...we guess pigs can fly. Seriously though it's waaay unhealthy for her to be this fat and the woman ain't even got small ankles or anything...it's fucking huge everywhere. Please stop eating Gabby cause you're gonna put yourself in an early grave!

[Image via SPLASH]

CRUELLA WOULD TOTES NOT HIRE THIS

Looks like another hair and make-up queen has got it in for actress Joely Richardson cause lady was looking weird at a recent product launch in London. The sister of the bird who died in a skiing accident (very sad no BS) was papped walking the red carpet and her hair looked fucking rank to say the least. The woman's only in her late 40s but looks so much older with the dated attire and horrendous makeover. Better luck next time Joely!

[Image via CONTACT MUSIC]

YOU WANNA A RANK BODY? WORK BITCH!

Oh man this kinda sucks cause we were rooting hard for Britney Spears after seeing how SMOKING hot she looked in her new video for Work Bitch. Sadly it seems digital trickery was heavily used as leaked images show the before and after and let's just say she didn't get that body from doing crunches at the gym. Long gone are her naturally rock hard abs and legs and in their place sits a flabby muffin top and chunky thighs. Now we get that she ain't fat but for Britney this is a mess.

[Image via HOAX VID/RCA]

SINCE WHEN DID DIANA HAVE A MULLET?

Following a pretty shit attempt to be Princess Diana in the new movie Diana (too creative), actress Naomi Watts graced the cover of In Style although something looks a little off. Wouldn't have something more classic looked better seeing as she's promoting a movie about a fucking princess? Also what's the with Scandinavian dyke hair and make up cause it looks nasty and don't suit Naomi at all. Now of course we always think we know best, but in this case bitch don't look hot. Just sayin'.

[Image via IN STYLE]

THE ADDAMS FAMILY HAVE ARRIVED PEOPLE

Back in the day Sharon Osbourne looked damn good for her age, but nowadays Shazza don't even look like herself. As for the daughter Kelly she's one big retro tranny mess who gives fashion advice...sorry we just can't even go there. What the fuck has Sharon done to her lips though cause it just looks like one massive trout pout people. There is a limit to what you should have done honey!

[Image via SPLASH]

THIS AIN'T GONE MAKE A CUTE BRIDE...

Man now we LOVE us some Nene Leakes but girl really ain't the best looking crayon in the box. The hilariously blunt reality star can be seen in her new show I Dream Of Nene and it sure as hell ain't the most flattering shot of the Atlanta housewife. What's going on with that waddle fat too Nene...you're only 45 years old?

[Image via BRAVO]

DON'T TRY AND EAT THE MICROPHONE TOO

Kelly Clarkson has always had a good set of pipes, but for some reason the singer and former Idol winner can never seem to stabilize her weight. It seems she's either Free Willy or Nicole Richie and we don't get why it's so hard for some birds? The poor thing really needs a new stylist too cause the person behind all her recent outfits is clearly holding a grudge.

[Image via WENN]

THE INSIDIOUS BRIDE WOULD BE SHOCKED

The Sizzling Mess is still finding it kinda hard to get over how rough and plain Rose Bryne looks minus the slap and this occasion was no exception! The actress was snapped having a quick coffee in LA over the weekend and looked virtually unrecognizable if you compare her to Helen from Bridesmaids! It's totes shocking and tbh we're just wondering how she landed such a hot fucking husband?

[Image via SPLASH]

MILEY HONEY...YOU JUST AIN'T SEXY!

It totally escapes us as to why so many people think Miley Cyrus is hot cause all we see is a wannabe try hard with too many teeth trying to perform fellatio on a sledgehammer. The pop star can be seen in an outtake from her slutty video for Wrecking Ball and it's safe to say bitch looks like a chipmunk with an STD. We think Liam is totes better off without the skank.

[Image via RCA]

THERE AIN'T NOTHING VOID TO ENTER NO MORE

What in the fuck has happened to Paz De La Huerta? We like how that reads she's so relevant but in reality everyone is gonna be like who the fuck is this bitch? Anyway the actress (she ain't done much) was snapped partying with a pal who looked suspiciously like Paula Yates from beyond the grave and lady looked like a total bloated mess. We're not sure if she's eating scripts as opposed to reading them nowadays, but bitch seriously needs to assess her portion control. Girl's got a right pair of birthing hips on her en all!

[Image via PACIFIC COAST]

KEEP YA EYES WIDE SHUT FOR THIS SHIT!

Nicole Kidman was once a beauty that graced our screens, but for some reason she felt different and had a fuck load of work done cause bitch was looking plain nasty the other day at a press junket. The money hungry actress who took Tom Cruise to the fucking cleaners was seen sporting some fuck off awful trout lips and just a bizarre face in general. Why in God's name did she do this to herself?

[Image via GETTY]

MERCEDES WOULDA CHECKED THAT WEAVE

Oh honey as if you left your dance rehearsal without looking in the mirror! Poor old Amber Riley was snapped in LA the other and it looked like she'd finally started working up a sweat...talk about overdue. The actress sported some strange kinda stocking things and her trusty new money LV bag was by her side as usual (for the ghetto in her), but what was going on with that sweaty weave and horse mouth? We love you Mercedes but next time check yo'self in the mirror girl.

[Image via GSI]